There are so many things that I have yet to do and acquire to become the person I want to be. At times, such as today, I feel that this vision of me is so far away.
Sometimes I wake in the morning and I know where I am going and what I need to do. The energy levels are so high up its exhilarating; it’s just wonderful. Yet there are the other mornings. The ones where waking up seems pointless. My eyes open with no focus and no destination. My heart cries out of desperation, a lonely ache pounds on the walls of my chest, loitering in my throat; seemingly forever.
I hate these thoughts and feelings of defeat. That’s why I learnt to challenge myself. Honestly, I don’t always succeed in my challenges. Sad to say, but more often than not I get bored and forget about my challenges somewhere along the way. Or worse would be when I never had the initial willpower to see them though.
That being said, I will list a few challenges I have completed or am still undergoing, just as a little pick-me-up, because I need it right now.
- Learning Portuguese – I’ve been studying Portuguese with DuoLingo 20 minutes every day for 319 days and counting. Really proud of myself here!
- I have been going to the gym four to five times a week for the past two months having a couple of goals in mind. The first is to be able to run for 15 consecutive minutes, and the second is to become healthier. Looking at the calories on the treadmill does make me think twice before undertaking the fourth bar of chocolate.
- Starting this blog. To many, it may seem like an easy thing to do, but for me, it’s not. This is quite an imposition, and I am uncomfortable. I am uncomfortable sharing my personal thoughts and feelings to the world, especially since I know how whiny I can get. I am afraid of the responses you will post. I worry I will bore you with what may just be a wannabe dreamer. Hence, I step out of my comfort zone, and start this blog.